Are you belittled?
He loved children and dogs. He was a vegetarian. He didn't smoke or drink. His chauffeurs and secretaries loved him. Suddenly he was appointed to take a government position, when he came to power in a country in the depths of a horrible runaway inflation and turned it around, making the country one of the strongest economic powers in the world. Pride set in, he brought down millions of people and completely destroyed millions more. His name was Adolf Hitler.
There are times we meet people of this nature who want to control people around them. Many of them apply force to achieve respect from others, they make their victims slaves or tools of oppression.
To belittle means to put down, or to make another person feel as though they aren't important. To belittle is to deny another of the ability to express his opinion. The offender always tries to engulf others self-esteem to elevate own dignity.
More so, class status, colour of your skin can also cause one to belittle another, like wise inferiority complex or jealous can also lead another to belittle a person. According to some psychological authors, proved if you belittle yourself, others around you will belittle you. There is a clear difference between one who is humble and one who has a low self esteem.
Nevertheless, to belittle can also take the form of one who offers a gift or a helping hand to another but in return demands obedience, the giver subjects the receiver to slavery. This is common in the world as many people around the world belief every gift has a price. They make the receiver indebted to them. Some say "No free bees", therefore steals the receiver's voice and freedom.
An act of Kindness is a selfless service without expectation, in order words, if you help someone and expect something in return, you're doing business not kindness.
In actual fact people should understand, we are tools in God’s hands.With the responsibility to help each other. God gave you to give another, Man should not take pride in himself, for only God makes all things possible, nothing can be achieved without Him. God in all his kindness and love gives us freely without demand of slavery and expects us to do the same.
"And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full".(Luke 6:34)
For instance, you cover for your coworker because you know you’ll need her assistance next month. You give your sister $20, and then silently look for ways she can pay you back, even if not monetarily. You help your friend get leads for a job, and then feel angry when she isn’t as proactive in offering you support.
Expectations - Tie your intentions to an internal score card, which places a wedge in your relationship with them. One who belittles you for any reason enslaves you, he does not need to put you in chains. According to the oxford dictionary Slavery can be “a person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them.” Slavery can also be defined as the denial of self-determination. Slavery is treating a human being like an animal without hope but in total obedience to his master.
Some man or husbands have failed to understand the difference between submissiveness and slavery.
A woman or anyone does not owe you their soul, everything is a choice. When you make the choice to love, respect and be submissive, it should not be misunderstood to mean enslavement.
However experience has shown that Human nature dictates we’ll act with one eye on what’s in it for us, at least occasionally.
Nevertheless, God expect us to show love to one another without expecting anything in return. True Christians love as God requires - 'Love as I have loved you". Differentiate yourself from the unbeliever, you are a mirror of Christ goodness.
The more you know about God, the less you think of yourself, because you realize how much He does for you that you do not deserve. When you realise God covers you with His grace and mercy, the less critical you will be of others’ mistakes.
Love is there to pick up those who are down, not to kick them down further. Paul said, “those of us who are strong and able in the faith need to step in and lend a hand to those who falter, and not just do what is most convenient for us. Strength is for service, not status” (Romans 15:1).
However, since we live in the world occupied by many people whose attitudes we can not control, here are some tips on what to do when you are belittled.
1. When belittled, be your own cheerleader and say; “He did that to me because he wants to diminish his insecurity. I should forgive him.”
2. Just walk away when you are being belittled. But if this person happens to be your superior or someone elder than you, in order to show your respect and courtesy to him, you may give a brief response first before you walk away.
4. If you feel distressed by the belittlement, it means that you are indirectly agreeing what has been said by the offender. As long as you disagree and believe that the negative statements are wrong, you will be extricated from the suffering zone.
5. When someone disregards you never forget the capabilities that makes you proud, never forget your worth.
6. Take the belittle attitude to your strength. Being belittled is also a way to make us growing to be a better and stronger person. It can bestown you with the virtue of patience and tolerance.
7. The world is occupied by both positive and negative people. Spend more quality time with positive people this will make you live happier. This is simply because the positive has the power to dispel the negative.
8. We can avoid ourselves from being hurt by replacing the negative impacts with more positive thoughts.
9. Apply the 90/10 rule which implies 10% of our life is made up of what happens to us; 90% of our life is decided by how we react. Therefore;"things will turn better if you can react in a positive manner.”
STAY POSITIVE STAY STRONG, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
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